10 Random Poker Quotes

• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• Fook the floosh droo!