10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.