10 Random Poker Quotes

• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• Wise man say, "man who seeks revenge, should did two graves" ActionDave
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson