10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• im going to 2 out you to death
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Never educate a stupid poker player.