10 Random Poker Quotes

• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• If you could lose all of your money again... what would you have done differently?
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer