10 Random Poker Quotes

• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe