10 Random Poker Quotes

• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• Poker is for loners.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!