10 Random Poker Quotes

• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--