10 Random Poker Quotes

• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.