10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"