10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Poker is for loners.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-