10 Random Poker Quotes

• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.