10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."