10 Random Poker Quotes

• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• "I had 2 high." -Sammy Farha
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"