10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"