10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger