10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz