10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• I'm enough of a dreamer to realize it might have been that elusive something a gambler calls luck. But, I'm also enough of a realist to know that in general we make our own luck - through knowledge, skill and experience.- Doyle Brunson
• "All-in, bitches!!!"