10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves