10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• im going to 2 out you to death
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• When you win... Rub it in!!! When you lose.. Drink the booze!!!!! Los Altos Dirt Bikers
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.