10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• If you could lose all of your money again... what would you have done differently?
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.