10 Random Poker Quotes

• This site pulls more flushes than a public restroom!!!
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.