10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• "No river, no fish."
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• God is kind to the underdog! C.A.A
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.