10 Random Poker Quotes

• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• You can't let it get you down when somebody knocks you out of a tournament playing a hand they shouldn't have played. Without these types of players, nobody would win any amount of money, so sometimes you just have to take your medicine. - T.J. Cloutier, Championship Omaha
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."