10 Random Poker Quotes

• "No river, no fish."
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."