10 Random Poker Quotes

• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• When you win... Rub it in!!! When you lose.. Drink the booze!!!!! Los Altos Dirt Bikers
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus