10 Random Poker Quotes

• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Sucking out won't help you. The only cure for stupidity is losing. -- The BRICK --
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.