10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from