10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.