10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• Fook the floosh droo!
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen