10 Random Poker Quotes

• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "No river, no fish."
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.