10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus