10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.