10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."