10 Random Poker Quotes

• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.