10 Random Poker Quotes

• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Some people ask "what could they possibly call me with" before making a bet. I don't ask that question. I just make the bet and let them supply the answer. - Action Bob
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986