10 Random Poker Quotes

• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.