10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• Fook the floosh droo!
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "I dont mind getting beaten by a good player, and I dont even mind getting beaten by a bad player, but I cant stand getting beaten by a bad player who thinks he is good." H.L.B. Tunica, MS
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water