10 Random Poker Quotes

• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester