10 Random Poker Quotes

• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)