10 Random Poker Quotes

• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "I dont mind getting beaten by a good player, and I dont even mind getting beaten by a bad player, but I cant stand getting beaten by a bad player who thinks he is good." H.L.B. Tunica, MS
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson