10 Random Poker Quotes

• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "Give me running 10's boy!!" Mike Laing - after CALLING 78K with 10-8 on a board of K22
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "I had 2 high." -Sammy Farha
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine