10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright