10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)