10 Random Poker Quotes

• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.