10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• It's Free To Fold...
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.