10 Random Poker Quotes

• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.