10 Random Poker Quotes

• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."