10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "I guess there's nothing left but all in." -Greg Raymer