10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow